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Honey Badger Talking Plush
$24.99 $14.99
Honey Badger Talking Plush
"Here at ThinkGeek, we pride ourselves in being fun for geeks of all ages. So, what does one do when there's a meme that gets 90% of its humor from words one doesn't say in polite company? We'll just let you fill in the blanks, because if you're a fan of the Honey Badger, you know exactly what words are. This is definitely an R-rated honey badger. What does that mean? By MPAA standards, it means that you'll hear the F word more than once while enjoying your Honey Badger Talking Plush. The Honey Badger is a true bad_ _ _, _ _ _ _ing gross, and doesn't give a _ _ _ _ about what you think. In fact, he doesn't give a _ _ _ _ if you buy him or not. He's just going to smack the _ _ _ _ out of our robot warehouse monkeys. Please, save the robot warehouse monkeys. Product Specifications Talking Plush version of everyone's favorite animal, the honey badger Recommended age: 17 or accompanied by a parent or guardian R-Rated (you'll hear the F word more than once!) Looks snuggly, but will rip your head off Includes 6 phrases from the viral video: Honey Badgers are quite bad_ _ _ and out of their _ _ _ _ing mind. Ewww… that's so _ _ _ _ing gross! Honey Badger don't give a _ _ _ _. Look at that sleepy _ _ _ _. Honey Badger just smacks the _ _ _ _ out of it. It's getting stung like a thousand times… it really doesn't give a _ _ _ _! Dimensions: 15"" long"
ThinkGeek
Phantom Keystroker
$9.99
Phantom Keystroker
With the advent of the incessantly beeping and easily concealable Annoy-a-tron, ThinkGeek has ushered in a new era of sophisticated office pranks sure to drive your co-workers bonkers while you snicker silently at your desk. Now the next advanced level in stealthy office joke electronics is ready for your enjoyment. The Phantom Keystroker may look like a harmless usb thumb drive, but it's actually a devious contraption of unlimited office-based torture. Simply discreetly attach the Phantom Keystroker to any extra USB port on your victim's computer, no drivers needed. The Keystroker emulates a keyboard and mouse and periodically makes random mouse movements, toggles caps-lock and types out odd garbage text and phrases. Switches on the side allow you to choose between keyboard garbage typing, caps lock-toggle, annoying mouse movements or all three. An adjustment dial sets the duration between "events". We recommend you don't set it too frequently so as to extend the agony. Your hapless co-worker pal will think his computer has been possessed or infected by a destructive virus. As he writhes in anger and furiously dials tech support you can rest easy with a job well done. WARNING The Phantom Keystroker never hits the return key and it never clicks the mouse button. However you should not use it on anyone's system who is doing critical work where disruption could cause serious consequences. The Phantom Keystroker is a joke, like any joke you need to use prudence and judgement when executing it. You have been warned!
ThinkGeek
Space Gun LED Keyring
$4.99 $3.99
Space Gun LED Keyring
"Every outer space adventurer needs three things: a fast ship, a quirky sidekick (alien or robot, preferably), and a reliable blaster. It's up to you to win your own fast ship in a gambling game and earn some blood oath or something for the sidekick. But for the blaster, oh have we got you covered. Presenting the Space Gun LED Keyring! It's so small, you'll never be without it. The Space Gun LED Keyring is just a joy. It's little, it's cute, it's space-age plastic with a rubbery coating, and it goes PEW! when you pull the trigger. That's right, the Space Gun LED Keyring isn't just about good looks. A bright red LED with flash and a loud PEW! will sound with each trigger pull. It will vanquish aliens, monsters, coworkers, and any other malevolent entities you come across. Or, at least, it will make them smile. Get a few Space Gun LED Keyring today, and hide them in all your pockets. Never know when you'll need a little Pew Pew!! Space Gun LED Keyring Pull the trigger and get a nice, loud PEW! and a flashing, red LED tip! Attaches to your keys or pants or body hardware - anywhere you might need a quick draw pistol. Batteries: 3 button cell, non-replaceable batteries (included). Dimensions: 2"" long."
ThinkGeek
Seed Bombs Throw and Grow Plants - Tasty Herbs
$7.99 $4.99
Seed Bombs Throw and Grow Plants - Tasty Herbs
Real bombs are sad. Real bombs hurt. Real bombs are for making things break. Seed Bombs are happy. Seed Bombs heal. Seed Bombs are for making thing more beautiful. Seed Bombs are a simple way to add smiles to the face of the planet. We added a few more words to be more descriptive; we call them Seed Bombs Throw and Grow Plants, and you can learn more about them by reading the next chunk of words. Welcome to the next chunk of words...
ThinkGeek
Dismember-Me Plush Zombie
$9.99 $5.99
Dismember-Me Plush Zombie
What happens when you take old broken plush toys and bury them in the woods by the light of the full moon while whistling the theme song from "Halloween"? Unfortunately nothing...which is why the skillful design monkeys here at ThinkGeek were forced to come-up with our own scary (but cute) zombie plush. The Dismember-Me Plush Zombie begs to be torn limb from limb. After all he is a decaying re-animated corpse turned into irresistible cuddly plush. Rip off an arm... he doesn't mind...
ThinkGeek
Aïkiou Cat Stimulo Feeding Station
$24.99 $19.99
Aïkiou Cat Stimulo Feeding Station
The problem with housekittehs is that they tend to get lazy. And fat. Take a look at the itinerary for your average cat and you’ll find 16-18 hours of sleeping, interspersed with eating, grooming, and horking what was eaten/groomed out on to the carpet. Maybe, if there is some motivation to do so, exercise will happen, but probably not. Oh look, that really good sunny spot just appeared... Got a fat cat? Or maybe one that needs a little brainteaser? Stimulo is an interactive cat food dish that stimulates the intellect and entertains your cat (or small dog!) during his meal. Hide the bits of kibble in the bowl’s many tubes. When Kitteh wants food, all he needs to do is reach into the tubes with his paw and fish it out. Meals take longer to eat, which prevents weight gain and reduces digestive problems. Stimulo has also been known to bring back interest in food for older cats. It’s like the hunting and foraging that his ancestors did... but with less bloodshed. Product Specifications Interactive cat (and small dog) food dish that stimulates the intellect Hide dry food in the bowl’s many tubes for kitty to fish out with his paw Engages kitteh’s hunting and foraging instincts Helps reduce digestive problems from eating too quickly Helps prevent weight problems Maintains a healthy mental balance by making kitty think Brings back an interest in eating for older or sickly cats
ThinkGeek
Cat Scratch DJ
$29.99 $9.99
Cat Scratch DJ
Did you know that the new generation of cats has a burning desire to DJ? It all started in 2007 with Rap Cat, the official entertainment of the left side drive-thru at Checkers. (He's got the hottest beats and the softest fur.) Then kittens started climbing up on real turntables and trying to break into the music scene. They succeeded in being popular on YouTube, but no record deals have been signed as of yet. Train your cat to be the next superstar DJ with the Cat Scratch DJ. This cardboard mixing deck shaped cat scratching mat features a spinning deck and posable tone arm. It comes flat-packed, but you can fold it together in just a few minutes. No tools, no glue! Sprinkle a little bit of catnip on the deck to get your kitteh interested and soon you'll be taking hilarious videos of your feline getting the party rocking. Product Specifications Cardboard mixing deck shaped cat scratching mat Features spinning deck, posable tone arm, and kitty DJ stickers Easy assembly (folds together) with no glue or tools necessary To get kitty interested, sprinkle a bit of catnip on the deck Dimensions: 15.25 inches long x 13.75 inches wide x 5.75 inches tall when fully assembled
ThinkGeek
Panic Button Light Switch Replacement Kit
$24.99 $14.99
Panic Button Light Switch Replacement Kit
In every sci-fi film or TV show, there is usually one easily recognizable trope - no, not the hypersexual female alien in the skin-tight cat-suit, though she does make a fairly regular appearance. The answer we're looking for is the panic-button. You know, the Red Button™! The big shiny candy-like button that erases history, ejects the warp core, blows the emergency seals, activates the self-destruct, sounds red-alert, engages the hyperdrive, activates the halide fire-retardants, or simply flushes the waste-disposal system is a regular character in most sci-fi. It's curious, then, that the Big Red Button™ doesn't appear in your home or office! Wouldn't it be great to have one of those buttons, even if pressing it doesn't warn the sentries that the world-killer virus has escaped containment? What about your light-switch? Isn't that little flippy-lever overdue for a makeover? Sure it is, otherwise, you wouldn't have read this far! What we're offering is a wired replacement for your light-switch. Just turn off the breakers, pull out the light-switch and replace it with this one. It's a wire-for-wire swap, so it should be easy. Please be safe, though, and double - nay - TRIPLE CHECK that the breakers were switched before doing any home wiring. When you're done, you've got a Big Red Button™ that, when slapped, will turn on and off your lights. Also, if you just want to dim your lights and your computer voice-activation phrase isn't recognized by your home-automation equipment, your new Big Red Button™ also acts as a dimmer. Instead of smacking it, a gentle turn will lower the illumination to a level suitable for alien seduction. Features US Light-switch replacement kit 2 3/4" by 4 1/4" brushed aluminum wall plate and large red dimmer switch Not suitable for fighter ejection panels, nuclear rod extraction, or fire suppression systems Let's be serious here: Please use caution when performing any electrical work in your house Make sure you trip the breaker to your outlet to the off position before attempting to replace your switch
ThinkGeek
Grow Your Own Banana Tree
$9.99 $5.99
Grow Your Own Banana Tree
"Ah, bananas. You can tally them. You can feed them to monkeys. You can pretend they are guns and rob banks in silent comedies and cartoons. AND, they are high in potassium! Oh, and if a bad guy is chasing you, you can so totally drop the banana peel on the floor to create instant hilarity! But here are two things you might not have known. 1. The ""banana tree"" is not actually a tree; it's the world's largest herb. 2. If you get one of these Grow Your Own Banana Tree kits, you'll have almost everything you need to, well, grow your own banana tree (that's really an herb). See, each Grow Your Own Banana Tree comes with everything you need to grow some nanners except for water, sunlight, and unadulterated monkey love. The package is actually a mini greenhouse, and it's guaranteed by the manufacturer to grow. Once the banana tree (we're gonna just call it that for ease, so hush) sprouts, it will grow about a foot in the first month. Treat it right, and you'll have a six foot tree on your hands in about a year. Of course, actually growing fruit will take a bit longer, but if you work hard at it (and don't forget all the monkey love), your Grow Your Own Banana Tree kit could eventually yield fruit! MONKEY LOVES BANANAS! Grow Your Own Banana Tree Banana trees are easy and fun to grow - so grow your own, already. The banana tree grows about a foot in its first month and as much as six feet in its first year. Actually, it's not a tree at all; it's the world's largest herb! Includes: Banana tree seeds, windowsill greenhouse, planting mixture, and instructions/information sheet. Package (Greenhouse) Dimensions: 9"" x 4.5"" x 6"""
ThinkGeek
Enough Social Interaction Fitted Ladies' Tee - Heavy Metal, XXL
$19.99 $9.99
Enough Social Interaction Fitted Ladies' Tee - Heavy Metal, XXL
Geeks: we're one big group of loners. Most of us are not much good at the whole social interaction thing. In fact, we've trained our whole lives to be Not Good at it. From playing house alone to petitioning to be the project manager, technical lead, designer, and tester all in one on your next project, you know that other people just make life more complicated. But don't worry. You're in good company here. You're amongst people who understand, cause we're like that, too...
ThinkGeek
Exercising the Penis
$29.95 $19.97
Exercising the Penis
To meet the demand for a quick and easy-to-read book on the growing art of penile exercising, author Aaron Kemmer spent over five years learning from doctors, experienced experts, and thousands of men who have built a bigger and harder penis using exercises. The result? Exercising the Penis teaches you how to increase your penis size. In a survey of nearly 1,000 men who used penis exercises for three or more months, the average size increase was one inch in length and one-half inch in girtha volumetric increase of nearly fifty percent. Yield harder, stronger, and longer lasting erections. In one study, men who exercised their penis had improved their erection strength just as much as men who took erection drugs. A healthier penis and penile vascular system will help you increase libido, create stronger orgasms, develop a healthier prostate, and more.
Buy.com
Anti Monkey Butt Anti Friction Powder
$5.99
Anti Monkey Butt Anti Friction Powder
Say Good-Bye To Chafed Thighs. This Product Is Specially Formulated With Patented Satiny Smooth Powder To Minimize The Frictional Discomfort That Ladies Often Experience When Using Exercise Equipment, Running, Driving, Cycling, Or Just Walking. Its Unique Ingredients Work Quickly To Absorb Sweat And Provide Cooling Effective Relief Of Irritation On The Inner Thighs And Other Areas Of The Skin Prone To Rubbing. Indoors Or Outdoors, Work Or Play, Or On Occasions When You're On Your Butt All Day, Don't Let Your Buns Get Red. For All Day Protection With Calamine Powder Sweat Absorber And Friction Fighter
Walgreens

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